Change my world, Please
by Summersfan
Summary: AU after Season 2. Buffy meets Spike and Drusilla in LA, causing Dru to run off, and Spike offers her a choice. Complete!
1. Chance meetings with pain

Disclaimer: I own nothing.  
  
Summary: A total AU from Season Two onwards. After Buffy ran away she meets Spike and Drusilla, who offer her a choice.  
  
I saw the insufferably smug little Slayer just after we got to LA. She wasn't looking quite so smug these days, but I could feel my mouth watering just at the sight of her.  
  
What can I say. I have this sick little obsession with Slayer's.  
  
She was just wandering, her face a little dead. I glanced at Dru. Dru was still mad at me, and pouting. And ignoring the world.  
  
"Would a little Slayer make you happier, love?" I asked her.  
  
"You helped the Slayer. Didn't help daddy." She replied.  
  
"Well, love, we can make it better." I purred. "We can kill a Slayer!"  
  
This was perfect. A perfect way to remind Dru why she's mine, and not Angelus'. Because I can kill the Slayer, and he couldn't. And what's more, Slayer blood is an aphrodisiac.  
  
Talk about a way to relight the fires.  
  
I was going to have fun with this one.  
  
Time to kill another Slayer.  
  
I grinned widely, shifting into my demon face. "It's time to live again, love. It's time to destroy and burn. It's time to be us, Dru."  
  
She looked at me, and I felt my heart melt. The look she gave me was pure Dru, all confused but a little happy, with a suddenly burgeoning bloodlust. God, how I love that woman!  
  
"A Slayer?" She whispered. "The one who killed daddy?"  
  
"Yes!" I hissed. I could feel myself starting to come alive, starting to truly live again. I could see her dark eyes roiling with the infinite dark possibilities, the infinite ways to make this Slayer suffer.  
  
"Let's." She said finally. Just that one word.  
  
"Stay here." I said, and jumped out of the car, speeding down the dark street in pursuit.  
  
She wasn't hard to find. She had been traveling in a straight line. Just walking listlessly. Alarm bells started going off in my head-was she this far along her death wish already? I mean, I knew that Slayer's were filled with a love and yearning for death, but this was just strange. Her blonde hair hung limply down her back, and it smelled as if she hadn't washed in a while.  
  
Her hands hung loosely at her side, and when she heard me coming she turned around slowly, wearily, all her alertness gone.  
  
"Spike." She greeted me, just as I was starting to doubt that it was really her. She was changed, so different.  
  
"Slayer!" I said, trying to make up for her lack of enthusiasm, get this fight off to a good start.  
  
"Should have figured you'd find me." She said.  
  
"Should have been more careful." I sneered. I was genuinely puzzled at this point. What was going on? Why was she like this?  
  
Her eyes were flat and dull, and I could see the tracks through her dirt- smudged face where tears had streaked downward. She was a mess.  
  
I suddenly realized that this wasn't going to be fun. This wasn't going to be a challenge. This wasn't even going to happen.  
  
"You want to fight?" She asked.  
  
"Well, yeah. Vampire, Slayer, that's what we do." I said.  
  
"Just make me one promise." She said.  
  
"I don't make any promises." I said.  
  
"Promise me I won't wake up a vampire." She said.  
  
I stared at her. That was so far from what I had been expecting, so different from what she was supposed to say, that I was unable to respond. My mouth, usually so willing to pick up the slack for me, just sort of froze.  
  
"Shut up!" I finally said. "You're the Slayer! What kind of way is that to talk to a vampire?"  
  
The mood had been ruined. A minute ago I was ready to start making some real mayhem, look for a real fight. Now I was standing here with a pathetic wretch that I couldn't even fight, really. I mean, I could. I kill her, easily. Very easily.  
  
But where would the fun be in that?  
  
She laughed at my words. "I don't know. How does, I love you, close your eyes, sound to you?"  
  
"Oh." I said blankly. "You killed Angelus, and now you're in a funk."  
  
"To save the world." She said bitterly. "Are we going to do this, or what?"  
  
"Hey!" I said. I was beginning to get a little angry. "I'm not your convenient little suicide machine, you know! I have pride! I'm not just going to kill you because now you want it!" I moved closer, my hands still at my sides. It took a real effort not to ball them into fists. "When I kill you, you won't want it. You'll fight me to the last breath. That's when I'll kill you, Slayer. When I kill you, you'll be scared to death, terrified. And it won't be the easy way out."  
  
"If I fought, you couldn't take me." She replied with a flash of her old fire.  
  
"Oh?" I could feel my demon face coming on, my face shifting. "Could you? Could you really?"  
  
"I could." She hissed. "And why aren't you out of the country?"  
  
"Uh, hello?" I said. "Cut me a little slack! We're on our way! Just stopped for a quick snack. Uh, and gas." I said when her eyes flashed fire.  
  
"You're a monster."  
  
"Hey! I bloody well saved your librarian's life!" I pointed out. "Helped save the world, all that rot! My word is good, and I'm on my way out of here!"  
  
"Yeah, I saw you earlier." She replied. "You really enjoyed helping me out, beating on Angelus. And since when is your word good? Your word is worth nothing."  
  
I growled. She has a way of getting under my skin, I can't help it. She makes me feel like I'm William again, sliding downhill. Out of control. Can't think of a response quick enough. Just a hurt little boy getting whipped verbally by a smart girl.  
  
"You're a monster." She repeated. She had talked herself up to it, and now she was ready for the fight.  
  
And so was I.  
  
I lunged, slapping my feet against the ground and jumping at her. She responded with a brutal right hook to the face, turning my momentum against me. I tumbled to the ground, but rolled back to my feet and advanced.  
  
She was crying again.  
  
It spoiled the moment entirely. "Aw, c'mon!" I snarled, throwing my hands out to my sides. "He's dead! Get over it, already! Can we just have this fight, can we? I mean, I thought we were having a moment, here!"  
  
"Oh, violent death-filled moment? We both know you love those." She sniped.  
  
"Yeah, but you're ruining it!" I snapped.  
  
"I don't care!" She snapped. "He was, was the only man I ever loved! And he's dead!"  
  
"That's hardly the end of the world!" I replied. "There are other guys out there!"  
  
She glanced behind me, and I became aware that Drusilla was floating closer.  
  
"Are there other women out there? Women other than Drusilla?" She asked me. I tensed, defensive.  
  
"Yes." Said Drusilla. "Love is fickle, fickle. He'd leave in a moment, heart wreathed in newness."  
  
"Ha!" Said Buffy. "He fought his own grand-Sire for you! He helped the Slayer save the world! You don't honestly think he could change, do you? You don't honestly think he could love another?"  
  
"You could." I sniped. "Anybodies better than the great white pillock."  
  
"I couldn't!" She snapped.  
  
"Could, could, could." Sing-songed Dru.  
  
"Want to bet?" Said Buffy.  
  
"Bet what?" I asked, naively.  
  
"I'll bet that you couldn't get over Dru, and I couldn't get over Angel. Neither of us could find someone else. Love does that; there's only one for you." Replied Buffy. "I know I can't fill the hole in my heart that Angel left. And you could never get away from your big old ho here."  
  
I growled. "Shut up. All right, Dru, kill her."  
  
Dru tittered. "No. She's wrong." Said Dru. "Love is fickle. And I've already left, even if you can't see it."  
  
"What?" I asked.  
  
"You hurt daddy. And you liked it." Said Dru. "Now, kill the Slayer, so we can leave."  
  
"What are you going on about?" I asked. "I did it for you, Dru!"  
  
"Too little." Said Dru. "Too little blood in this world. Too few hearts. And yours isn't mine, not anymore. You broke me, you naughty boy, when you broke daddy." She turned and started to walk away.  
  
My undead heart began to pound. "Dru!" I screamed, turning to run after her.  
  
Buffy grabbed me, tripping me up. I struggled to my feet, staring at her. "What-what was that for?"  
  
She shrugged. "I hurt. You hurt." I stared at her. She had lashed out at me because she wanted me to feel like her?  
  
I guess misery does love company.  
  
And Dru was gone, disappeared in that ineffable fashion of hers.  
  
I let out a long, load roar into the night.  
  
Buffy smiled wickedly at me. "Serves you right." She said.  
  
I went for her throat with both hands. 


	2. Pain management, Spike style

Disclaimer: Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy, those lovely imaginative people, own everything. I, nothing. Alas, my heart bleeds.  
  
Summary: AU past Season Two. Buffy meets Spike and Dru in LA. Spike challenges her, and Drusilla leaves Spike.  
  
Author's Note: I don't want to mess with POV a lot. That's a good way to get confused and get in trouble. So this chapter is entirely Buffy POV. Previous was Spike, as you might have noticed. I won't try to surprise you, I'll tell you who's mind we're in. Mostly because for some of the introspective pieces, it might not be immediately obvious, and I hate playing guessing games while reading. Well, beyond the fun ones.  
  
Somehow the vampire always knows how to get under my skin. He's an animal, a vicious beast with ADD. But his words are so perceptive, so nimble, so crafty. They crawl under my skin like little bugs.  
  
And that is such a bad mental image.  
  
So we fought.  
  
And we fought.  
  
I wasn't in the fight. I really wasn't. That just made him madder, made him scream at me. By now I wasn't even listening to him. He was just noise, feeding my pain.  
  
Have you ever had to look into your lover's eyes and kill them?  
  
I don't think so. That's one of those things that you don't just do. Hey, honey, I love you, close your eyes. Bam. Next, please.  
  
I can't even laugh at my own jokes. Because they aren't funny.  
  
Ow!  
  
My nose hurt. And he just stood there.  
  
"Are you even listening to me?" He asked. He stared at me with contempt, with all the cold rage he had left over. Which wasn't much, because his rage is pretty hot. His voice was low, like steel scraping over iron. Rusty iron. "You are so bloody self-involved, it's pathetic. What'd you do, run away from your family? Leave all your little friends behind you could wallow?"  
  
I pulled my knees up to my chest, leaning against the wall behind me. He had knocked me to the ground, and I could feel blood trickling down the side of my face.  
  
He began to pace in front of me. His duster flared behind him like a cape a vampire would wear. He and Angelus both wore dusters, big cloaks dragging behind them. Why was that? Was it a Dracula complex or something?  
  
Don't know, don't care.  
  
"Why, you have a problem with wallowing?" I shot back.  
  
He turned to face me, flipping a cigarette out of his duster. "You know, I should just kill you and go find Dru. That's what I should do." He lit the cigarette and took a long drag.  
  
"You should." I said. "If you could."  
  
"You talk a good talk, but look at you!" He sneered at me. "You're just a big girl with no sense at all, ready to die."  
  
"When life's over, what's the point in living?" I asked him.  
  
I meant it. What kind of life is there, without Angel? He made me more than I was. He completed me. Without him, I was nothing. Nothing.  
  
"Women." He sneered. "So dramatic. So big. He's just a man! Get over him!"  
  
"How's it feel?" I asked. I couldn't stand it, the way he was talking about Angel. "You lost it when Dru started hanging with Angel, admit it! You saved the world for your woman! Well, she's just a woman, Spike! Get over it!"  
  
He stared at me, and his features melted back into his human face, his yellow eyes fading to blue. "That's not fair." He said. He was entirely serious as he said it. "That's just not bloody fair."  
  
"Fair?! I had to kill my man! You try killing your 'Dru,' see how you feel!" I yelled at him. He was driving me nuts. I climbed to my feet wearily.  
  
He threw the cigarette on the ground and stomped it out with his foot. "Why would I kill Dru?" He asked.  
  
"I don't know." I hesitated. "Let's say she was going to kill you, and take up with Angel."  
  
"She wouldn't do that." He replied confidently.  
  
"She would in a second!" I hissed. "You know why? Because Angel is so much more of a man than you are! He's better than you, and he's--"  
  
He lunged for me, his eyes flashing yellow again. I was ready for him. I knew he'd break down at that, and I ducked left, kicking him in the chest, a sideways kick. He grunted, falling back, and charged forward, slashing at me with his fists. One connected with my shoulder, and I let out a yelp of pain.  
  
One hit me solidly in the face, and I reeled away, stars flashing in my vision.  
  
"Who's the better man?" He demanded. "Did Angelus ever fight you like this? Could Angelus ever have got this close?"  
  
I grabbed him by the collar and punched him in the face. I felt his nose break under my fist, and he howled in pain, jumping back and covering his nose with both hands. "He got closer than you ever will." I spat. "To me, and to Drusilla."  
  
The horrible beast took another step back, keeping his hands over his nose. His shoulders were shaking, and I knew he was laughing at me. I stared at him, balling my hands into fists.  
  
I blinked when I first saw a tear slide down his cheek. I blinked again when I realized he wasn't laughing.  
  
The Big Bad, the tough animal, the vicious beast, the pig, was crying. 


	3. Sing your blues away

Summary: After Season 2, Buffy meets Spike and Drusilla in LA. They offer her a choice.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own even a little bit.  
  
Authors Note: Um, thanks for the reviews. I will keep on. But, er, kathypg? Emotional healing for Slayers is not, I'm afraid, exactly what Spike's all about. Not here, anyway. As for whether this will be B/S--I think very much in terms of B/S. But this will be a different kind of B/S. And definitely not Spuffy. his chapter is written in Spike POV.  
  
She knows just what buttons to push. Now I've started crying, and she's standing there sneering. Why? Why!?! Of all the bloody times, why now?  
  
She didn't relent. She stood there staring at me coldly, as if trying to wrap her mind around some odd paradigm, some freak of nature. Finally she spoke.  
  
"You don't want to admit it, but you do know. You know very well."  
  
"Know what?" I asked, and cursed myself, trying to bite back the tears. This was no time to be soft! Now was the time to be the Big Bad, to destroy, to make her suffer!  
  
"You know how much it hurts." She accused me.  
  
"Maybe I do. Won't stop me living, pet!" I snarled at her. "You won't see me turning into you, destroying myself for the sake of Dru. Sure, she's everything, the world--but I'm not just going to be you, to throw my life away, to turn into some sodding puddle of mush! Not for her, not for anyone!" I thought about that for a second. "Actually, I'm lying." I conceded. "I'd just about do anything for Dru. Maybe die."  
  
She stared at me and I quickly wiped my tears away on the sly, covering up the motion with a flick of my wrist. "Broke my bloody nose." I said flippantly. "Well, how about it? Ready to finish the job?"  
  
She stared at me and then turned away. "Just get lost, Spike." She said.  
  
"Wrong answer!" I replied. "I'm a vampire. You're a Slayer. It's what we bloody well do!"  
  
"Maybe. But not today." She replied.  
  
I bit back my angry reply as she moved away. I could feel pain and anguish welling up in me--and that made me feel like Angelus. Or maybe the poet. I let out a snarl, baring my teeth. "Bite me!" I snapped at her, turning and heading the other way.  
  
I needed to find Dru.  
  
I wandered, searched, caused a little mayhem, fed, and generally couldn't find Dru anywhere in LA. She was goner than a gone gone gone--  
  
Yeah, I got sloppy drunk at that point. Wouldn't you? I wandered into a demon bar and began drinking. Bloody Marys.  
  
That's when I realized that the blasted bar was a karaoke bar. Some ponce was belting out an Elton John tune from the stage, mangling it badly. I wanted to strangle him. A lot, not just a little. I got up and swam my way to the host, who was standing there with a slightly nauseated look on his face.  
  
"Throw him out." I suggested rudely. The green host looked at me, the horns on his forehead fairly quivering.  
  
"There's no violence allowed in the Caritas." He told me urbanely. Just another soft-voiced moron, obviously. "But he's almost done. And he won't be doing a second number."  
  
"Thanks." I said.  
  
"Would you like to?" He asked me.  
  
"What'o I look like, Elton John?" I asked him.  
  
"No, Billy Idol." He said. "Surely you have some song you'd like to sing. Some song about loss and love and women."  
  
I'm so bloody transparent, sometimes it hurts. I put on my best Big Bad face. "Do you really want to hear me sing?" I asked him.  
  
"I love to hear people sing." He assured me. "Who else would operate a karaoke bar but someone who loves to hear everybody sing?"  
  
I was too drunk to think about that too far. I was just about to collapse already, and here he was asking me to sing. I glowered at him.  
  
"Just don't you start." I warned him. "Just don't you start." I didn't say start what, because I wasn't really sure at that point. When the last notes faded out I headed for the stage.  
  
"All right, what'll it be?" I asked, turning around and nearly staggering as I stood up the mic.  
  
"Perhaps some Billy Idol?" Suggested the host.  
  
"No!" I said. "That bloody singer stole my look! I don't do his stuff. Maybe a little. . ."  
  
The host shook his head. "Maybe a little classical stuff for you. The Rolling Stones? Under my Thumb?"  
  
"No!" I yelled it. "None of that! I'm already bloody well under the thumb!"  
  
"The Ramones?" He asked me. I snorted.  
  
"The Ramones. Yeah, bring it on. I believe in miracles." I said, grinning.  
  
The first chords took my soul, and I grabbed the mic in both hands, screaming the lyrics.  
  
Used to be on an endless run. Believe in miracles 'cause i'm one. A have been blessed with the power to survive. After all these years i'm still alive.  
  
I'm out here cookin' with the band. I'm no longer a solitary man. Every day my time runs out. Lived like a fool, that's what i was about, oh.  
  
I believe in miracles. I believe in a better world for me and you. Oh, i believe in miracles. I believe in a better world for me and you.  
  
Tattoo your name on my arm. I always said my girl's my good luck charm. If she could find a reason to forgive, Then I could find a reason to live.  
  
I used to be on an endless run. Believe in miracles 'cause I'm one. A have been blessed with the power to survive. After all these years I'm still alive.  
  
I believe in miracles. I believe in a better world for me and you. Oh, I believe in miracles. I believe in a better world for me and you.  
  
I close my eyes and think how it might be. The future's here today. It's not too late. It's not too late, yeah!  
  
I believe in miracles. I believe in a better world for me and you. Oh, I believe in miracles. I believe in a better world for me and you.  
  
As the music faded I jumped off the stage, landing spryly on my feet. I felt a lot better. I turned to the host, who was as white as a ghost. Even with the green skin I could see fear in his color.  
  
"Thanks, mate." I said. "That was just what I needed."  
  
"Anytime." He said, his voice squeaking.  
  
I grinned. "This place is bloody great! I'll be sure to visit. You know, whenever I'm in LA."  
  
I set out the door whistling, humming my favorite part. "Believe in miracles cause I'm one, heh."  
  
I bumped right into this black kid. "Hey!" He said, bunching his hands into fists. I was in such a good mood I smiled, shaking my head.  
  
"Sorry." I said good-naturedly. "I wasn't paying attention."  
  
I walked on, whistling and humming. Miracles, yeah. Miracles happen. Like a poet waking up a miracle. That's a miracle.  
  
I'm a horrible drunk. I get all sappy and sentimental. Even just a little human, if you ask me. I become the poet. All the way. It's a horrible thing.  
  
But there was only one thought on my mind, so that was okay.  
  
I was going to find Buffy.  
  
And I was going to kill her. 


	4. The Fight

Summary: AU after Season 2. After a chance encounter in LA where Drusilla left him, Spike is hunting Buffy.  
  
Authors Note: This chapter is all in Spike POV, again. I like playing with the way he experiences reality--watch for it.  
  
It took my forever to find her, because she was still more or less where I left her. She was now sitting on the edge of a pool that was fed by a fountain. Her hair was shiny and wet, and she didn't smell. She wasn't smiling, but she didn't look like she was still suicidal.  
  
Perfect. Now when I tore her throat out with my teeth there'd be some satisfaction to the kill.  
  
"Slayer!" I shouted it at her.  
  
"Son." She said.  
  
"Son? What?" I was dumbfounded. "Son of who?"  
  
"Not son, you idiot. Sun. As in sunrise." She said. Her voice was flat.  
  
She was right, of course. She always had to be right, always had to be better than me. Just another of her little digs on me. The air was filled with that bright humming warmth that's a warning to bad little vampires to get off the streets. I growled.  
  
"You think you're getting off easy?" I asked her. "I'm going to get you."  
  
"No you're not." She replied. "You're going to bluster and yell and go away because you're a creature of the night. You don't live in the day."  
  
"Neither do you." I sneered.  
  
She looked at me and smiled. An arrogant, nasty smile. She always was full of herself. "I belong in the sun."  
  
"You belong in the dark with the animals!" I growled. "You're a freak like the rest of us! You don't belong with the humans! You can protect them, but they'll never accept you!"  
  
She tilted her head at me, and I felt a lurch in my stomach as the icy glare bit into me. To cover for it I yelled again. "Come on, I don't have the rest of my unlife for this fight!"  
  
"Yes, you do!" She hissed. I felt a burning rage come down around me. How dare she condescend to me like that?  
  
I carefully stepped closer, aware that there was only a few steps left between us. "Are you ready to dance, little girl?" I asked her.  
  
She grinned suddenly, and I knew that this time her heart was in the game. This time I wouldn't be cheated. This time the best man--or little girl, as the case may be--was going to rip the other's heart out.  
  
She came forward with a stunning kick aimed at my forehead, a dazzling mix of Oriental style and good old fashioned British alleyway get the job done. She nearly did, to, except I took the blow and kept coming back, growling and attacking.  
  
There were screams and I could feel water on my face as she punches me, the little drops whirling off her skin to land on me. I tensed, almost expecting them to burn, but this little girl hadn't planned for this fight, not this time. I growled, launching myself at her again, attacking with everything I had.  
  
She stepped back and punched me in the face, hard. I howled with pain as I felt my cheekbone break. I staggered back, wiping blood away from my face. She shook her hand.  
  
"Funny, I didn't expect your head to be that hard." She quipped.  
  
"Laugh now." I retorted, punching her in the face. She rolled back with the blow, sweeping my legs out from under me with a hooked ankle. I hit the ground and rolled back up to one knee, growling.  
  
"You can't win!" I told her.  
  
"Actually, I just did." She said.  
  
I felt a slight prickling against my face first. Then I smelled the smoke as my face burst into flames. With a growl I launched myself forward into her, slamming the Slayer back into the fountain.  
  
At the same time as I felt cool relief as my face was extinguished she kneed me in the crotch. I felt pain explode upwards and I howled down at her, holding her under me in the water.  
  
She kicked me again, sending me skittering through the water. I could feel the suns rays on my back, so I used the momentum to jump upwards, shielding myself with my duster. I ducked down and ran for the nearest building, pushing the door open and pushing myself inside.  
  
She ran into me from behind as I stopped dead, unable to enter. "Oh, not now!" I howled, pulling the coat over my head.  
  
"Yes, now!" She barked, grabbing me and throwing me to the ground. I tried to roll under my coat. She grabbed it by the lapel, forcing it open. I felt my skin smoking, and I grabbed her wrist, biting down hard on it and lunged forward. She gave a gasp and I pushed her back down on the ground and punched down beside her head, smashing the manhole cover.  
  
She grunted, grabbing my coat lapel again. I shrugged, and this time I slammed a hand into her forehead. The back of her head cracked sharply against the pavement, and now I could smell sweet blood trickling.  
  
I rolled through the hole in the ground, landing on a thin film of muck. I started running, feeling the heat and pain start to recede.  
  
She caught up with me easily because I was still limping from the kick she'd given me. "Time's up, Spike!" She said triumphantly.  
  
I turned on her. "You followed a master vampire into the dark. How dumb are you?" I demanded.  
  
She moved in, attacking me hard. I grabbed her by the neck and forced her to the ground.  
  
I leaned in closer as she grabbed my duster to try and hold me back. I leaned over her neck with a chuckle. "About out of fight, pet?" I asked her.  
  
"No!" She growled, trying again. But she was off her game from the blow to her head.  
  
I leaned in and nipped her neck with my blunt teeth. She hissed, bucking her entire body against me to try and escape. She succeeded in pulling herself back, but I came in again, inexorably, and pressed my lips against hers.  
  
I should've realized back on the street that I was seriously off my game. I was still royally sloshed, and I'd tried to escape the sun by entering somebody else's house. No vampire in his right mind will do that. Too smart. But my brain was totally off, and I was sloshed.  
  
And the whole fight had been off. I'd been way off my game. I usually have many, many more sarcastic retorts.  
  
Never fight when sloshed.  
  
It throws you off entirely.  
  
Authors Note: Just a little bit of a cliffhanger here. What can I say, I'm horrible. If you want the scene to progress, just R & R. 


	5. Aftermath of a kiss

Summary: AU after Season 2. After a chance encounter in LA where Drusilla left him, Spike is fighting Buffy, drunk as can be, and he kisses her.  
  
Authors Note: This chapter is all in Spike POV, again.  
  
She slugged me, hard, pulling away from me. I stumbled and fell face down in a flowing stream. I stayed there a minute before pulling myself up, running a hand over my face. We were apparently in a nicer area of the tunnels because the water wasn't all smelly, just a little slimy.  
  
"What was that for?" She demanded. "That how you get your kicks, not just killing Slayers, raping them?"  
  
"No." I said. "That wasn't. . .that wasn't anything. Forget it."  
  
"What, like it never happened?" She replied. She was shaking I could see now.  
  
I staggered backwards, into the shadows. My mind wasn't working, and I couldn't think why I had done it. Why was she mad, now? And why hadn't she attacked me now?  
  
She backed away from me. She seemed uncertain, somehow. Maybe fragile, like an effervescent bird of prey, made of glass and crystal fused in a delicate mix and hovering above the ground, ready to fall and shatter, or perhaps to spread its wings and fly above the ground.  
  
The poet in me tends to come out when I get really drunk.  
  
"You're afraid." I told her.  
  
"I'm not afraid." She said.  
  
"You're not afraid of me." I amended. "You're afraid of Angelus."  
  
"He's dead." She replied.  
  
"You're afraid of the grip he still has on you." I accused. "Afraid of your love for him, afraid to feel!"  
  
She didn't argue this time.  
  
"Your heart's been broken, and it just about broke you." I told her. Where did I get these insights, anyway? It came with the poet, I supposed. It all came in a flash, when I was looking at someone and realized why they were doing what they were doing. I couldn't do that when I was a poet. I couldn't understand people or monsters.  
  
Maybe I'd been studying them, trying to understand them, all this time. That had been the goal of my life, to finally understand people. Why not the goal of my unlife, too?  
  
"It did." She said. "Maybe it did break me. I ran away from everything I know."  
  
I snorted. "You ran away."  
  
"I couldn't face it. Not any more. Not saving the world. Do you know what the cost is?" She asked.  
  
"Your life." I said. I leaned back against the slimy wall behind me, knowing my coat would need cleaning. "Every day the clock is ticking, and you know it's only a matter of time."  
  
"I already died once." She said wistfully. "Just for a few seconds."  
  
I chuckled.  
  
"Don't laugh." She said. "It was your great grand-sire who did it."  
  
"The Master?" I laughed out loud.  
  
"Sure, it's funny to you. It wasn't funny then." She replied.  
  
"And?" I asked carelessly.  
  
"You brought me back from an edge, back up there." She said to me. "Back in the dark night in the cold streets, you showed me why I keep fighting."  
  
"Well, good for me." I said.  
  
"And now you want to tell me not to guard my heart, to love again?" She asked curiously.  
  
"I just want you to stop bleedin' whining all the time!" I said in my roughest voice. What did I care what her problems were? What did I care about her? I was here to kill her, not to coddle her through her problems.  
  
She stared at me a minute. "You're a little more complicated than you let on." She finally said.  
  
"You're not." I sneered.  
  
She frowned. "Why can't you accept that? Why is it so imperative you be a brute? Angelus had his finer points, even if they were disgusting. Why's it so important to you to be a thug?"  
  
"Cuz I am." I said smugly.  
  
"Right, and that's why you can see right through me, why you can tell me what's wrong." She didn't buy it for a second.  
  
"Hey, laser-vision woman. I'm a vampire." I growled it out. "I'm getting bored. Are you ready to fight yet?"  
  
"As I recall, you're the one who ended our last fight. By kissing me." She said. "You tell me what that's all about, and we can play."  
  
I hesitated. "I don't need your permission to fight." I told her.  
  
She shrugged. "Have it your way."  
  
I felt a chill run down my spine, then. She slid her hand through her hair, looping it into a small bob behind her head. She tied it there with a band from around her wrist, then leaned down and scooped something off the ground.  
  
"That's it, then, a fight." I said, disappointed.  
  
"No, not yet." She said. "I did agree to let you go, after all. And, unlike you, my word means something."  
  
"My word is good!" I hissed. "Don't you question that, not now, not ever!"  
  
She chuckled. "And there we go again with the layers."  
  
"Don't start!" I snapped at her.  
  
She held her hands up in the air. "Okay, whatever. Tell me something, Spike."  
  
"What?" I asked.  
  
"What was Angelus like?" She asked.  
  
"This is just wrong." I said, sliding down to a sitting position on the wall. She slowly lowered herself down too, sitting. Not against the damp wall, but near it.  
  
"How so?"  
  
"You're the Slayer. I'm a vampire. We should just fight, or something."  
  
"Not talk? Well, we sort of broke the rules before, teaming up and all."  
  
"True." I conceded. My head was still fuzzy, or I wouldn't have done it. I would have killed her. But I couldn't think, and her words were lulling me in.  
  
"Well?" She asked.  
  
"Horrible." I said with a smile. "The most vicious vampire I ever knew." I scowled then. "Never liked me. Always putting me down, putting me in my place. And his women did the same, always following his lead." I smirked. "I was never so happy as when he went and got souled up."  
  
"Because he was out of the way?" Asked Buffy.  
  
"Because I had an excuse to hate him!" Snarled Spike. "I was supposed to look up to him, I played his patsy!"  
  
"No, you wouldn't like playing second fiddle, would you?" Asked Buffy.  
  
"Not a bit! I'm a lead singer, not some backup!" I snarled out. She laughed, a tinkling giggle. I smiled, my best Big Bad smile. "Why, still moping over him?"  
  
"Trying to understand the difference between Angel and Angelus." She said.  
  
"Difference? He's mopey and boring and loves you with a soul. He's exciting and vengeful and hates you without one. Doesn't take a lot of thought." I replied.  
  
She sighed. "What do you remember from before you were turned?" She asked.  
  
I cleared my throat, and considered what I remembered. "Not much." I offered.  
  
"Oh, come on!" She said. "A name, anything?"  
  
I thought about it. "Well, it wasn't pretty." I said.  
  
"What, you were a boyscout, helped little old ladies?" She asked sarcastically.  
  
"Well, I'll just say, I got the name William the Bloody long before I was turned." I said, smiling at her. She shrugged.  
  
"Yeah, I can see that." She said. "You're in love with your big, bad image, aren't you?"  
  
"What is this, pop psychology 101?"  
  
"You started it. You're always doing that, saying, oh, you're a Slayer like all the rest, blah blah blah, you have emotional issues, blah blah blah."  
  
I laughed, I couldn't help it. "What?" She said, annoyed.  
  
"I'm sorry, that's just funny." I apologized.  
  
She sniffed. "It's funny, is it?"  
  
She was wearing a necklace, I noticed. A cross, hanging around her neck. "Well, if you don't think so, whatever." I said. "But it is. Okay, maybe I do. So, why? You're the pop psychologist of the moment."  
  
"You're so drunk, you're starting to make sense." She complained.  
  
"Maybe." I said.  
  
She waved a hand at me in a dismissive fashion. "So what's a drunk vampire doing chasing a Slayer? Seems to me that's not the smartest thing."  
  
I let my demon face come up. "Seemed to me like a good idea at the time."  
  
She made sound that might have been meant to sound scoffing. "It's never a good idea to commit suicide." She said.  
  
"Did it once before and it turned out okay." I riposted, not realizing the truth of my words until too late.  
  
"You mean getting turned?" She asked. "How'd that work out for you?"  
  
I bared my teeth. "Solved all my problems."  
  
"Your girlfriend just walked away." Said Buffy. "That problem isn't solved."  
  
"So I'll go hunt her down and torture her till she loves me." Said Spike. "Easy enough to understand."  
  
"Whatever." Said Buffy, rolling her eyes. "And you just kissed me because you were totally sloshed. And the fact that I'm totally hot had nothing to do with it."  
  
"Hey, you're hot? I have vampire vibes going on over here." I replied. "Not to mention the abs."  
  
"I've never seen your abs." She pointed out.  
  
I lifted my shirt, revealing my perfect abs. "Eh?" I said.  
  
"You're a pig, Spike." She sighed.  
  
I laughed at her, and leaned my head back against the wall. "Eh, you're not so bad."  
  
"I'm not?"  
  
"Nah. And your mums all right too. Right good with an axe, too." I reminisced. "I love that in a woman."  
  
"Yeah. She was great, wasn't she." Said Buffy proudly. She glared at me. "That was really rude of you, attacking the school just then."  
  
"I was bored." I replied.  
  
"Hey, I was nearly kicked out of school because of it! Although, I guess that doesn't matter now."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"I got kicked out for saving the world." She said with a sigh.  
  
I laughed. "What a bloody world! You go around saving it from the uglies in the night, and they don't even have the decency to teach you up all proper!"  
  
"Yeah." She said.  
  
"They're probably evil." Said Spike.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Well, you know. Because of the whole thing with the kicking you out. If I were evil, and planned to use the hellmouth, I'd get the Slayer out of there, pronto."  
  
She frowned. "That seems odd."  
  
"Yeah, I guess." I replied.  
  
"So, now what?"  
  
"Now what? No I go get Dru back." I replied with a smile.  
  
"Oh." She said, disappointed.  
  
"What?" I asked, annoyed.  
  
"Well, you get to get your girlfriend back, but my boyfriends stuck in hell!" She shot back at me.  
  
"You could fix that." I replied.  
  
"How?"  
  
"There's some pretty powerful mojo out there." I replied, seriously. "You can do anything, if you can pay the price."  
  
"Pay the price? What, Germanic virgin's hearts?"  
  
"No." I chuckled. "Usually they have all kinds of nasties they want you to fight, you know, trials."  
  
She frowned. "I could get Angel back."  
  
"Sure!" I said.  
  
She grinned. "Okay, let's give this a shot."  
  
I frowned. "What do you mean, we?"  
  
"Well," she said, "I doubt I could find these guys. And if they can bring my boyfriend back from hell, can't they bring your girlfriend back to you?"  
  
I thought about it. I thought about it a good long time.  
  
"No." I said.  
  
"Oh, come on!" She said.  
  
"What, bring Angelus back? Not on your life! I hated the bloody poofter, still do! No, not happening."  
  
She glowered at me. "Okay. Guess we're back to plan one."  
  
That's when inspiration struck my brain. "Wait, wait. I have an idea."  
  
"What's that?"  
  
"We go to one of these mojo guys, and then when we beat his little trials, we go head to head. You versus me. Winner takes all and gets the wish."  
  
She thought about it. "Oh, I so could take you." She said. "Remember the piano?"  
  
"Luck." I said firmly. "Just luck."  
  
"Winner take all." She said. "Deal." 


	6. What's new, pussycat?

Summary: AU after Season 2. After a chance encounter in LA where Drusilla left him, Spike teams up with Buffy to go to Africa and see a shaman.  
  
Authors Note: This chapter is all in Spike POV, again. WARNING: The end to this chapter may disturb you. If you have a weak stomach, skip it. You have been warned.  
  
One of the most dangerous things in this world is making plans while you're dead drunk. It's right up there with fighting the Slayer.  
  
Although in this case, it was twice as dangerous as fighting the Slayer.  
  
She was driving. That was bad enough, but she was a bad driver. She was all over the road, and if it hadn't been abandoned and empty, a barren strip of pavement, I would have made her stop.  
  
I continued to drink heavily. Every time I started to sober up this deal I had made seemed like a stupid, crazy thing, and I couldn't live with myself. Which seemed like a good reason to drink heavily.  
  
"I'd say something about your undead liver, but I really don't care." Said Buffy, screeching the tires.  
  
"Easy!" I growled. "Light movements, gentle movements! Didn't anyone ever bother to teach you how to drive?"  
  
"Nope. This is my crash course." She said defiantly.  
  
Suicidal women make lousy drivers, I decided. "Pun intended, I hope? The lines are what you're supposed to stay between, woman!"  
  
It's just a good thing my car wasn't a stick-shift. I wasn't exactly in any shape to drive myself, as it was. I took another long pull on my drink, a rather mellow one. I glanced blearily at the label, trying to guess what I was drinking.  
  
Wine, actually, I realized after a second. That was a surprise. I didn't think I had anything less than ten percent proof stashed in my car.  
  
I offered the bottle to the Slayer. She took a drink and made a face. "Eugh."  
  
"What?" I said, moderately offended. "It's wine, Slayer!"  
  
"I was expecting whiskey or something." She said. She took another drink. "I didn't expect something sweet."  
  
I chuckled, snagging the bottle back. "I'm full of surprises." I boasted.  
  
"I'm sure." She replied. She glanced at the dashboard. "We need to stop for gas."  
  
"Again?" I asked.  
  
"Well, sort of. I need to make a pit stop." She fidgeted. "Food, drink, bathroom. You know, the human essentials."  
  
"I am kind of hungry." I noted.  
  
"No!" She snapped. "No killing!"  
  
I rolled my eyes. "Oh, come on. You must be joking."  
  
"No!" She said. "Any feeding, that's an abrogation of our deal!"  
  
I made a dismissive sound. "You're joking!" I said. "You're rewriting our deal!"  
  
"Be that as it may." She replied.  
  
"No, I will not accept that." I said. "I need to be at full strength for my end of the bargain. I will feed, do you understand me?"  
  
She glared at me, taking her eyes off the road. "Eyes on the road!" I bellowed. She jerked the wheel around, correcting, and the tires screeched again.  
  
"Look, I will feed." I said, slow and dangerously. She giggled. "What?" I demanded.  
  
"You did your tough-guy thing again." She said. "Sorry. It just seemed funny." I glared at her suspiciously.  
  
"You're drunk." I accused.  
  
"Just a bit tipsy." She said.  
  
"How much of my wine did you drink?" I demanded.  
  
"Not much!" She said defensively. "I mean, well, it was on an empty stomach."  
  
"Great. Now we have an incompetent and drunk driver!" I said.  
  
"Could be worse."  
  
"How?"  
  
"You could be driving."  
  
That shut me up till we pulled into a stop'n'shop. As she pulled up to the gas pump I growled. She glared at me.  
  
"You will not feed, you understand?"  
  
Then she left, entering the store. I got out and began pumping gas, the strong scent burning up into my brain. It didn't help clear my head, as I was so drunk the gasoline fumes were probably the least flammable thing in my head.  
  
I glanced around. The store clerk was outside, smoking a cigarette.  
  
I glanced back where Buffy had disappeared into the bathroom. There was no sign of her.  
  
I could do this. I could kill this guy, drink his blood, and be done before she was back. There would be no evidence. There would be no consequences.  
  
Until she tried to pay for the gas.  
  
I thought about it for a good ten seconds, and then the tank was fill. The clerk wandered over, oblivious to his death brewing in my eyes.  
  
"Hi." He said. "That do it?"  
  
"Snacks too." I ground out.  
  
"Okay." He said, heading inside. I watched him go, itching for his neck.  
  
Buffy still hadn't emerged. I followed him inside the store, where he waited patiently. "What'll it be?" He asked.  
  
You, I wanted to say. I want your blood. I want you dead.  
  
I was mute.  
  
Then it came to me. Of course I was mute. I couldn't kill him, or feed on him. If I did that the Slayer would fight me, and I was too drunk to fight. I had to do this. . . for Drusilla. I was sacrificing for Drusilla.  
  
The things I do for my dark queen.  
  
"Have to wait for the little woman." I said derisively.  
  
Of course, now there was the problem of food. After all, if I couldn't have a Happy Meal, what was I gonna do? I surveyed the store. No blood.  
  
The man grinned. "I know how that goes. I'm here, with my girl's pet cat. Has to be fed three times a day."  
  
I nodded. "Always giving us menfolk their little projects." I said. I remembered all the half-drained girls Drusilla had given me to finish off. She hated finishing a victim. For the first half, the blood comes easy, but as they run out of blood you have to work for the blood. She didn't like that.  
  
"Ain't it the truth, brother." Said the clerk. Buffy came in.  
  
"Here." I said, tossing her a roll of cash from my pocket. She stared at it. "Gas and snacks." I reminded her, heading out.  
  
She joined me in the car. "I expected you to feed." She said sheepishly. "I was getting ready to fight while I was in the bathroom."  
  
"Didn't feel like fighting just then." I said, wiping cat hairs off my lips. She stared at me.  
  
"That's disturbing." She said. I passed her the wine bottle. 


	7. Drunk conversations

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. I'm not creative at all, my original entries on FictionPress not withstanding. Joss is the Creative One.  
  
Summary: Buffy and Spike team up to go fight a demon for a Big Wish-one Big Wish, two warriors. You do the math.  
  
A/N: Spike POV. Bit of foreshadowing. Symbolism. Fairly hammy stuff.  
  
"You know," she said. "I love Angel."  
  
I rolled my eyes. "I got that."  
  
"I mean, I really love him."  
  
"Got that."  
  
"True love, you know? Meant to be?"  
  
"I know all about that." I replied. "Do you know what my reality is?"  
  
"Pain, suffering, and all the other fun stuff?"  
  
"No. It's love. When you come right down to it, everything I do is out of love."  
  
"Love and boredom."  
  
"Sod off, Slayer." I snapped. "I'm trying to drive."  
  
"Whatever, don't get your tights all in a bunch."  
  
"Tights?"  
  
"Underwear?"  
  
"You're bloody pasted."  
  
"True." She giggled, lolling back in the chair. "But it's true. You only get one."  
  
"One what?"  
  
"One that changes your world." She said.  
  
I snorted and rolled my eyes. "Right, like Angelus changed yours."  
  
"He did." She said earnestly. "There's only one. They come along without any warning, just sneak into your life. They can change your life."  
  
"You're a twit, Slayer." I replied.  
  
"I'm a twit?"  
  
"You can change your own bloody world! If only you would, you could. That's the truth of the matter."  
  
"It is?"  
  
"Yes! Change your own bloody world!" I was snarling at this point. "Make your own choices, do something right!"  
  
"I hate you." She muttered, rolling back in the chair. When I glanced at her she was breathing deeply, curled up fetally.  
  
I ignored her, ignored the warm blood screaming out from beneath her skin. It wasn't easy but I was here for a reason. I had a purpose.  
  
Everything I do, I do for love.  
  
Even this.  
  
It's all for Dru. 


	8. Hangover

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. I'm not creative at all, my original entries on FictionPress not withstanding. Joss is the Creative One.  
  
Summary: Post Season-2 AU. Buffy and Spike team up to go fight a demon for a Big Wish-one Big Wish, two warriors. You do the math.  
  
I was curled tight into the seat, wishing I was in Prague again, fighting a mob, loving every second of it.  
  
The car bounced upward, the chair jarred me, and the tires squealed. The dank smell of a closed car came back to me and I groaned. "What?" I asked. "What?"  
  
"Sorry. Nothing." Apologized Buffy. Her voice was bleary. There's no other word for it. It cracked and was unsteady. In general, it acted as voices should not, unless they have a good reason.  
  
"You sound fairly morning-after." I said, and my voice cracked.  
  
"I am." She admitted. "You don't sound so chipper yourself."  
  
I groaned. "You know the cure to hangovers?"  
  
"Black coffee, sleep, uh,"  
  
"Don't sober up." I said, searching around for something to drink. "That's the secret."  
  
I could smell her in the air, the scent of an unwashed human. I could smell her sweet blood pumping just beneath the skin, a tantalizing smell. I growled, sitting up and pulling the seat up. "Where are we?" I asked.  
  
"Almost to the bay, where we jump the boat." She said. "Sun set a while back."  
  
"As well it should." I muttered.  
  
She sighed. "What am I doing in a car with you, driving towards a boat to take me to Africa? This is insane!"  
  
"Yeah." I agreed. "It really is."  
  
"Especially now you're sober." She said.  
  
"Oh, yeah." I agreed miserably.  
  
"I enjoyed our conversation about William the Bloody." She said smugly.  
  
"What?" No, I wouldn't do that, I reasoned with myself. There's no way I'd just start talking.  
  
Oh, crap.  
  
"Certainly a lot different than the way you told it the first time." She said smugly.  
  
"Hey!" I bellowed, shifting to game face. "You have no idea what I was!" I hissed out at her. "Just because I was a ponce, that's nothing! After I was turned, my life before that ceased to have any meaning! Any nancy-boy tendencies dies with the former owner of this body!"  
  
She giggled.  
  
I felt a sinking feeling just below my stomach, still full. "What's so funny?" I asked suspiciously.  
  
"Psych!" She whispered.  
  
"Aah!" I screamed it out. "I bloody well hate you!" I screamed.  
  
"I thought you were lying before." She said. "You're a poor liar. I can see right through you."  
  
I leaned back, sulking a bit. "That's just mean." I finally said.  
  
"I can't help it, I was curious." She said. She was slightly apologetic.  
  
"I hate you." I said again. "You stop this car, right now. We'll finish this. I'll bloody well suck your blood out." Was I whining? Ouch. She really had hurt me worse than I thought.  
  
She didn't slow down. "We had a deal. You wanna break it?"  
  
"My word's good!" I protested.  
  
"So drive on?"  
  
"Drive on!" I said.  
  
"You're pouting." She noted.  
  
"Why do you have to be such a witch all the time?" I asked her.  
  
"Why do you have to be such a jerk all the time?" She asked me. There was a long silence, and she sighed. "Because you hate being tromped down by a girl. Especially a pretty, popular girl. Because it used to happen to you all the time."  
  
"Shut up!" I growled.  
  
"Only I'm not one of the popular girls." She said. "I only seemed that way cuz I used to be. But ever since I was called. . . How do you lead a normal life and kill monsters? I'm different. I'm a freak."  
  
"Shut up." I said, with less venom this time.  
  
"I'm the one the popular girls mock, the one the football players make fun. I'm Buffy, the wonder-freak."  
  
I sat there in silence as her sudden revelations soaked into the car's leather interior. She sniffed. "I mean, not that I'm looking for some kind of geek chops here. But, you know. I know the feeling."  
  
"Been different." I said. "Ever since I was turned. Every time some git got in my face, mocked me, I killed them. Does wonders for the self esteem." I leaned towards her, smelling her blood. "I could turn you." I offered. She shuddered as I leaned closer. "You'd never be hurt by one of them ever again."  
  
"I can still hurt you." She said. "And I don't want to be a vampire."  
  
I sat back down. "Okay. Want a drink?"  
  
She groaned. "Yes." 


	9. Docks

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. I'm not creative at all, my original entries on FictionPress not withstanding. Joss is the Creative One.  
  
Summary: Post Season-2 AU. Buffy and Spike team up to go fight a demon for a Big Wish-one Big Wish, two warriors. You do the math.  
  
We arrived at the docks around midnight, and I shifted into my demon face, letting my enhanced eyes search the docks, providing their own light. "Do you have to do that?" She asked squeamishly. Rather than telling her it was for improved eyesight, I sniped at her.  
  
"What, not pretty enough for your delicate sensibilities?" There had been no moment with the Slayer. I did not do moments. I never had. That was something for the poet, not the Big Bad.  
  
"No." She said. "Too creepy."  
  
I shrugged, looking around. "Looks deserted." I said. "Let's go find us a place to stow away so we can journey to Africa."  
  
She sighed. "Yeah, off to Africa."  
  
"Not like you were doing anything better." I sniped.  
  
"No, I guess not." She said. "Try to stay out of trouble." She slipped off into the darkness.  
  
I admired her exit for a moment. The Slayer might be an agent of good, but there was a streak of darkness in her. A streak of evil, a streak of demon. What else can you call something that goes around killing things? It's her calling. A two-sided coin, dabbling in Demon while hating the Demon.  
  
That, and she was downright hot when she was being all cool and stealthy.  
  
I grinned and slouched against my car, slipping back into my human face. I didn't feel the slightest guilt over checking out the Slayer. I'm a vampire. We don't do guilt. We want, take, have.  
  
A teenager, not much younger than Buffy, wandered onto the dock behind me. I turned as she approached, watching her. She was wearing a black knit wool hat, and long rubber boots, with jeans a plaid shirt. She was the very picture of local color. She had faded brown hair, and freckles. Her face twisted up as she saw me.  
  
"What're you doing on the docks?" She asked.  
  
I thought about it for a moment. "Just catching a boat." I said finally. Her mouth twisted in a typical local way, the way that shouts, you aren't dressed right.  
  
"This dock is for freighters." She said, somewhat menacingly. I hid my laugh.  
  
"I know. I'm a bit lost." I said, apologetically. "My partner's run off to find directions."  
  
"Well, where are you going?" She asked. I frowned. Well, that was taking it a bit too far. It probably didn't help that my lies were as thin as an anorexic supermodel with stomach cancer.  
  
"I don't know, Africa." I snarked.  
  
She sighed, putting a hand on her hip. "Funny. Nice. Look, this is private property. You aren't supposed to be here."  
  
I mimicked her stance. "Oh, I'm not?" I asked playfully. "Why don't you take a chill pill, eh? I'll be out of here as soon as my partner gets back." Partner. I rolled the toxic word through my brain a few times, then thoroughly rejected the awful word.  
  
"Look, pal." She said again. "You can be difficult if you like. I don't care." She moved closer, heedless of the danger. I grinned, beginning to enjoy myself. Stupid people were fun to kill, but fearless people were even more fun.  
  
"You don't? That's good." I said, reveling in the moment.  
  
She frowned at me, squinting in the lack of light. "Why don't you-"  
  
I cut off her word with a quick move, grabbing her by the throat and morphing into my demon face, letting the human façade slip away. "You stupid girl!" I hissed in an unearthly roar. Fear rolled off her in waves as thick as molasses. "You think you own the night? The monster under the bed is real, little girl, and he wants you bad. He wants you to bleed and scream before you die."  
  
She was shaking, fear in her eyes. She grabbed by strong arm with both her hands, squeezing, trying to get more air. I moved closer, opening my mouth wide enough she could see my fangs.  
  
Yeah, I was loving this.  
  
Her eyes homed in one my canines and she stared down at them. "Are you ready to die, little girl?" I asked. I threw her down, sending her sprawling across the ground. "If not, I suggest you wise up and stay inside, huddling in your bed at night."  
  
My eyes could see her perfectly, but in the gloomy blackness all she could see was a shadow. I ghosted forward, using small, light footsteps to create the illusion of preternatural grace.  
  
Not that I needed the illusion.  
  
"Run." I hissed at her.  
  
She scrambled to her feet and did so, and I laughed as I slipped back into my human form. Buffy cleared her throat from behind me.  
  
I didn't bother dramatically whirling, but I was surprised. She had the uncanny ability to sneak up on me. "Slayer." I greeted her. I supposed she looked down on my little mayhem causing, and was ready to stake me. What a shame.  
  
"Why didn't you kill her?" She asked. "All you've done is wise her up. Now she knows better. Not just a Happy Meal on legs."  
  
I sniffed, flicking lint off my coat. "Never did like an easy kill. I prefer a challenge, pet."  
  
"Right. That's why you killed all those people in Sunnydale." She said.  
  
"Hey, I have to eat sometime." I said. "Besides, most of them I just gave to Dru."  
  
She squirmed. "You gave people to Dru. That's sick, it really is."  
  
"Hey, hey!" I said. "I let the silly girl live, didn't I? Doesn't that count for something?"  
  
"You let her live because you were getting a kick out of her fear." She replied coldly. "Don't try to make it some noble thing, because we both know it wasn't. Come on, I found us a boat."  
  
I growled under my breath. "Noble? Who said it was noble? I never get a break with you, do I, Slayer?"  
  
"No, you don't." She said. "Just remember, at the end of this road is a dusty death for you." She sounded determined.  
  
"At the end of this road is your death, and my reunion with the woman of my dreams." I replied.  
  
"Yeah." She said. "Come on."  
  
I looked at her closely, and felt a twinge of remorse. "It hurts you, doesn't it?" I asked.  
  
"What?" She said.  
  
"Your boyfriend." I said, as neutrally as I could. "Fifteen minutes with you made him a thing, just like me. A monster."  
  
"Shut up!" She said.  
  
"If we're going to spend a week cramped in a bloody freighter, I'm not going in while you're in a homicidal rage!" I snapped at her. "Okay? I'm sorry. You can fix it, okay. You're, whatever they call it, empowered. You have the power to fix the mess you made."  
  
"Shut up." She said again.  
  
"He's not like me." I said. "Not with a soul, he isn't. He's all noble and crap with a soul."  
  
"He loved me." She said quietly. "Why didn't Angelus?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"Vampires can't love." She said. "Not without a soul."  
  
"What gave you that idea?" I asked. "It's totally wrong."  
  
"If it's not, why didn't Angelus love me?" She asked again.  
  
"Because he's evil." I said. "Evil! Don't you understand evil? Evil doesn't love good things, doesn't love pure things. Evil loves evil things. You're good, and pure, and all that crap poets dream of. A good man can love. Evil can't."  
  
"You're full of crap." She told me.  
  
"I know." I acknowledged. I moved closer to her, lifting my arms in non- threatening manner. "He'll be as good as you remember. You'll wish him back with a soul. One that doesn't go away this time, all right?"  
  
She laughed. "Does the soul make him a different person?"  
  
"Don't know. Don't care." I replied. "Look, you're doubting his love. Don't. Okay, just don't. I love. I love deeply. Much as I hate him, Angelus, he's a vampire. Like me. With or without a soul, he can love just as deeply as I can. This quest, this is worth it. For love, for real love, you can do anything."  
  
"What happened to world changing not being real?" She asked.  
  
"I can change my world. I'm going to. I'm going to get her back. Come on, onto the boat. Let's go." She sighed.  
  
"Yeah, let's go." She flashed me a smile. "Thanks for the pep-talk."  
  
I frowned. Partner? Pep-talk? This was going downhill in a hurry. 


	10. What are you?

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. I'm not creative at all, my original entries on FictionPress not withstanding. Joss is the Creative One.  
  
Summary: Post Season-2 AU. Buffy and Spike team up to go fight a demon for a Big Wish-one Big Wish, two warriors. You do the math.  
  
A/N: Thanks for the reviews. Let's amp this up a little, shall we? Buffy POV, for a change of pace.  
  
I watched him carefully as he built a nest out of sheets and pillows. He ignored me, building a place that he could keep for the voyage, one where he could nap away the weeks of travel.  
  
He moved in quick, spasmodic bursts of movement, almost spastic. Without the incredible grace of his movements, I would have been repulsed. Somehow he made it look like a big cat moving, like a work of art.  
  
His platinum hair was his striking feature. When I first saw him, I couldn't see beyond the hair. It blinded me.  
  
Once you got used to it, there were whole universes beneath it. A world onto itself, that was Spike.  
  
I couldn't trust him. I knew that. I'm not stupid, present evidence to the contrary aside. He's a vampire. I knew it. He knew that this was a buildup to a fight that only one of us would walk away from.  
  
At the same time, he was there for me. There for me in a way that no other man in my life had ever been. Not even Angel. Angel had been good to me, right up until we slept together. And then I'd lost it all in the most unimaginable way.  
  
Spike was different. Watching him build the nest, then carefully begin construction on a second one, I couldn't quite put my finger on it. For one thing, he was a monster. Not a man, a monster. And he was still a better man than most.  
  
But he drank blood. He killed innocents. He was certainly no fairy-tale hero. No White Knight.  
  
And my thoughts were starting to scare me. Scare me bad.  
  
I wasn't thinking of him as a monster. I wasn't even thinking of him as evil. I was looking, considering, Spike as an equal. Spike as a friend.  
  
Somehow this journey, this mythic journey to reclaim Angel, had changed. It was supposed to end with Spike's death, but I kept forgetting that. Kept forgetting he was there as a sacrifice, so to speak. Not really, but sort of.  
  
And somehow I couldn't shake that feeling. That feeling that after all this was over, Spike and I would laugh about the dangers we'd faced. That we'd go back home and tell my mother and friends together.  
  
It would never happen.  
  
"Good enough, pet?" He asked.  
  
"Fine." I said sharply.  
  
He turned to look at me, surprised. "Not having another tiff, are we?"  
  
"No." I said. "Just sleepy. Good night, Spike." I moved past him and settled onto the makeshift bed he'd made in the cargo hold of the ship.  
  
He seemed baffled, even hurt, by my actions. I regretted them instantly, but I tried to tell myself it wasn't important. He's a beast, a monster. He's a vampire.  
  
It doesn't matter.  
  
I'm here to kill him.  
  
If only I could convince myself he deserved to die. 


	11. Docking in Africa

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. I'm not creative at all, my original entries on FictionPress not withstanding. Joss is the Creative One.  
  
Summary: Post Season-2 AU. Buffy and Spike team up to go fight a demon for a Big Wish-one Big Wish, two warriors. You do the math.  
  
A/N: Well, I have a question: a lot of you must know where I'm going with this. It's not that hard to figure out. Your mistake would be if you think it's going to be easy after that. How many of you think when the battle's over the war's over? Spike POV, cuz I like him better than Buffy. In a very strictly heterosexual way.  
  
She was sulking, suddenly, and I had no idea why. "What's the matter, pet?" I asked, settling down into my nest. Ah.  
  
"Nothing." She said, her voice muffled.  
  
We lay there for a second, and then I started talking. I couldn't help it, really. It always drove me crazy to sit quietly. I felt like that little boy again, lying there, helpless.  
  
I hate being helpless.  
  
"The git should have seen it coming, me betraying him. I never have liked playing by the rules, any rules. And I never have liked him going near Dru."  
  
"I suppose we never see the big things coming till they hit us." She said.  
  
"No." I agreed. "Darla didn't like me. She said I was too wild." I grinned. "You met Darla, didn't you?"  
  
"Yes." She said. "Didn't like her." She added.  
  
"You wouldn't." I muttered. "But, then, neither would I." I waited for her to speak, and when she didn't I continued. "I loved Angel for a bit. But then I hated him. I thought he was the friend and father I'd never really had-but he wasn't. He tried to take Dru from me, and I had to put up with it, because he was stronger. But he wasn't." I grinned. "Not back in good old Sunnydale. That's the first time I ever beat Angel, right there." I sighed contentedly.  
  
"And you saved the world." She said, her voice a bit sleepy already.  
  
I winced. "If you want to call it that." I said. "But it was for my own selfish reasons!"  
  
"And you let the kid on the dock live for your own reasons." She said sleepily.  
  
"Yeah! Because I'm big and I'm bad!" I replied. "I woulda killed her on a seconds notice, Slayer, okay? I don't care. I don't have a bloody conscience!"  
  
"And why is that?" She asked me sleepily. "Cuz you're so bad?"  
  
"Yeah!" I said. "I'm the big bad, and don't you forget it!"  
  
"I won't." She said in a forlorn voice and dropped off to sleep.  
  
When I woke up it was dark and she was standing over me, looking down. I gave a startled little jump. "What?" I said.  
  
"We're there." She said in a small voice.  
  
I turned my head, groaning.  
  
"You've been asleep for two weeks." She added.  
  
"Little vampire trick." I said with a smirk. "God, I'm starving!" I added, standing up.  
  
"I'm sure we'll find a suitable blood donor soon." She said. "By suitable I mean not human."  
  
"You're such a little prude, Slayer." I told her. "So repressed!" I grinned. "We ready to go?"  
  
She shrugged. "Sunset's in an hour."  
  
"And you woke me up already!" I cried out. "Couldn't let me sleep?" She gave me an odd look. "What?"  
  
"I didn't wake you up." She said. "You did that all on your own."  
  
I frowned. "What?"  
  
"I've been watching you sleep." She admitted with a shrug. "You just woke up suddenly."  
  
I thought about it. "Must have sensed sunset coming." I said, fidgeting. I looked both ways, looked up, looked down, and began to feel just a little antsy.  
  
She noticed, of course. She was watching me very closely. I returned the favor, watching her. She was making small movements with her hands, almost trembling movements.  
  
"What's got you bugged?" I asked her.  
  
"You do." She replied. "Now that we're in Africa, my Slayer sense's are off. Or something. I'm getting all vibe-y and stuff."  
  
"Vibe-y?" I asked, intrigued. I moved closer. "What do you mean?"  
  
"There's something in the air." She said.  
  
I stood still, listening. Feeling.  
  
It wasn't like the rush the Hellmouth gave me. It was a spooky feeling. I could feel the spirits in the air, and I could feel a rumbling, a vibration. It wasn't a good feeling.  
  
"What is it, Slayer?" I asked.  
  
"It's nastiness." She replied. "It's not good, Spike. It's not good."  
  
"It's fine!" I growled. "Quit spooking, Slayer!" I stood up. "We're going." I said, pulling a blanket over my head.  
  
"But you'll burn." She blurted.  
  
"So I burn." I said. "Come on!" We left in a hurry, my hands dancing a tune all their own.  
  
I didn't like Africa already.  
  
"Where to?" She asked as I pushed the hatch open and darted into the sun.  
  
I ran, feeling a million pinpricks in my flesh, feeling the burning start. I darted and jumped into the shade, where I could feel a low-level burn hitting me. I growled.  
  
"Car!" She said, pointing. I went for it, yanking open the back door and jumping on the floor.  
  
"Ey!" Said a male voice with an odd accent.  
  
"Don't mind him. He's drunk." Said Buffy sweetly.  
  
"Oh, tourists, ey?" Said the male as Buffy sat down, swinging her legs in front of my face.  
  
"Yes." She said.  
  
"Where to?" Asked the cabbie.  
  
"Spike?" She asked, leaning forward and putting a hand on my head. Her fingers twined into my hair, and suddenly I couldn't breath.  
  
"Gaborone." I said, calling on my memory for help. The cabbie laughed.  
  
"That's 300 miles away, long past Johannesburg!" He said. I hesitated. Not knowing where we were, I didn't know what to say.  
  
"Bus station?" Said Buffy.  
  
The car started moving. The hand went off my head, and I grabbed her ankle. She stiffened, but I tugged. She leaned down, and I could feel her hair tickling the back of my neck.  
  
"Johannesburg." I whispered. "It's only a hundred miles from there."  
  
She nodded. I could tell because her hair slid across my neck like a caress. I was half convinced she was doing this on purpose. I rolled over, sweeping the blanket up over me, cutting off my view.  
  
No use letting her know she was affecting me.  
  
"First time in Mozambique?" Asked the cabbie.  
  
"First time." Said Buffy.  
  
"Not me." I muttered.  
  
"Ever been to Maputo before?" Asked the cabbie. I assumed he meant me.  
  
"No." I said. "Never been this far south."  
  
Maputo. Coastal city in the south of Mozambique, and very close to Johannesburg, just two hundred miles off.  
  
We could be there very soon.  
  
"Bus station!" Said the driver. I looked up, tenting the blanket over my head. As I came up I tangled up in the Slayer's legs, lifting her legs up on my back. She grabbed my shoulder to keep her balance.  
  
Why was this so confusing? It was supposed to be easy. Not like this at all. I was here to kill the Slayer and make Dru love me.  
  
Suddenly everything was tangled and complicated, and I didn't even know what was going on.  
  
There was sun, but the bus terminal was in shade. I pulled the blanket over my head and went for it, leaving Buffy to pay the cabbie.  
  
Served her right.  
  
She joined me inside, where I was panting from the run. She glanced at the schedule.  
  
"Hmm. There's the one to Johannesburg." I shook my head.  
  
"Change of plans. That one goes to Pretoria. Saves us at least fifty miles, then straight on through."  
  
"Where are we going?" She asked.  
  
"Well, last time I was here some of the names were different." I said. "And I was only here for a short bit."  
  
"Didn't agree with you?" She asked.  
  
"Dru got homesick." I replied. "I don't even remember the place. It was her idea, and I paid no attention to where we were, as long as I could have her."  
  
She ignored me, studying the schedule. "When's the bus leave?"  
  
"Ten minutes." I said.  
  
"Oh. Good. I'll just go freshen up." She said.  
  
"Find me some blood?" I asked.  
  
"Sure." She said, moving away. I glanced around the terminal, seeing nothing. Just a superimposed afterimage of Buffy standing in the sunlight, a golden aurora around her head, the sun's light shining on her.  
  
We had to get to Botswana fast. A bus would take all tonight and into tomorrow. That was unacceptable. Too long, too long. I fidgeted, and thought about the alternative.  
  
She wasn't going to let me steal a car. I just knew it.  
  
I smiled a thought, and then Buffy was back. She had a mug in her hands, a steaming one, and a disgusted look on her face.  
  
I stared at her. She'd put it in a mug. And heated it somehow.  
  
"Thanks." I choked out.  
  
"Please, don't ever mention it." She whispered, scrunching her face up as I took the mug and drank.  
  
It wasn't human blood, but it was blood. I drank it and looked at the chipped mug. It was white, with nothing on the sides. "Thanks." I said again.  
  
"Please, don't mention it." She said again.  
  
"I could get us there. Tonight." I said. "But I'd need a car."  
  
She sighed. "No, Spike. Just. No."  
  
I pouted, but I let her get away with it. It didn't matter. A few hours didn't matter.  
  
She sat down next to me, and it did matter. A lot.  
  
TBC. . . 


	12. The challenge

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. I'm not creative at all, my original entries on FictionPress not withstanding. Joss is the Creative One.  
  
Summary: Post Season-2 AU. Buffy and Spike team up to go fight a demon for a Big Wish-one Big Wish, two warriors. You do the math.  
  
Somehow, the bus journey seemed forever. Stopovers, driving all day, and on into the night. It had a sleepy sort of rhythm, just sit and watch as the world crawled.  
  
I hated every second of it. Inaction is not my strong suit.  
  
That would be fighting.  
  
I didn't watch her. I pretended not to be aware of her. Not to be highly disturbed the confused thoughts and emotions racing through me.  
  
When we got there in the middle of the night and stood there in the dark, cool street, I felt relief flood me. Buffy began to prowl, sensing the same darkness I could feel tugging at me.  
  
"We're close." I said. "There's a cave a few miles from here. It's where we need to be."  
  
"How do you know this place?" She asked.  
  
"Drusilla wanted to feel it. They say you can feel hell itself when you're here." I said.  
  
"I can." She retorted. "It's worse than Sunnydale, always prickling."  
  
"You can feel the Hellmouth?" I said, surprised.  
  
"Hello, Slayer." She said. "Essence of demon bundled with goodness. Part of the package, Spike."  
  
We walked in silence, me leading the way. Walking with a Slayer behind you isn't restful. It kind of cramps your style.  
  
"It'll be challenges." I said.  
  
"Yeah." She said. She moved beside me and I felt better.  
  
"Now, it might be tricky, Slayer." I said. "Follow my lead, and we'll be fine."  
  
"The only way we'll be fine is if you follow my lead." She said.  
  
"That won't work!" I snapped.  
  
"Oh, come on, what century are you from?"  
  
"One, a very sexist one. Two, I'm not sexist, I'm evil. But you're just a kid!" I protested.  
  
"What?"  
  
"You're maybe a tenth of my age. If you're lucky." I said.  
  
"And you're maybe a tenth of my IQ. If you're lucky." She said.  
  
I could get used to this.  
  
I gave a tiny shudder at the thought. "Okay, walk faster." I said. "I'm bored."  
  
I broke into a run, the duster flapping behind me. She started running too, much to my surprise. It's true that I hang out with strong women, but Dru hates to run.  
  
Dru. Why did that thought turn my tongue to ashes? Although not in the literal sense. In a place like this you had to check.  
  
We left the town and ran over the little foothills, across the grass, through the trees, and finally, there was the cave. Buffy shivered, hard, as she saw it.  
  
"Feel it?" I asked her darkly, shifting to game face.  
  
"I feel it." She said, putting her hand on my arm. I shook it off quickly.  
  
"Don't!" I said sharply.  
  
"Geez, okay!" She said, surprised.  
  
"Sorry." I said. Why did I say that? "I'm just jumpy. In this place. And you set off my instincts."  
  
I didn't say which instincts.  
  
"Right, of course. You know, you do that all the time, not just here." She said.  
  
She'd missed my double meaning. She must have.  
  
I started down the hill, scowling down and around. "Into the cave." I muttered.  
  
There was a villager standing by the entrance, and as we walked down he started barking in his language. "Toyenza coyengara. Erio mtuwana."  
  
"Not asking for permission, mate." I said.  
  
"You can speak his language?" Asked Buffy, surprised.  
  
"What, I look illiterate?" I asked, annoyed.  
  
"Ymirira! Odja kufa! Ymirira!" He yelled, but we walked on by and into the cave.  
  
It was dark, pitch black. I could sense Buffy behind me, so I flipped open my lighter, revealing artwork all around. Buffy gasped in disgust.  
  
Images of people's faces in pain, bodies with blood pouring out of them, skulls.  
  
I felt a little nervous then. "Who would-?" She started to ask.  
  
Then I saw one, and held up a hand. She looked, and frowned. The image of a black figure holding out an arm to another, the second figure red and dripping blood.  
  
"Is that if we win or lose?" Asked Buffy.  
  
"Dunno, pet. Come on." I said, forcing cheerfulness. I went further in as the lighter blew out. I flipped it closed, not will to show the darkness intimidating me.  
  
Then voice came to us, from out of the shadows. "You seek me, vampire and slayer?"  
  
Bigtime mojo. Creepy. "You do the finger paintings? Nice work" I said cockily.  
  
Buffy nodded. "We seek you." She said. A pair of green glowing eyes appeared in front of us.  
  
"Something about a woman. And a man. Both vampires."  
  
"Yeah!" I said. "Thinks she can walk away from me, just cause I saved the world."  
  
"And you want her back." Said the demon. The eyes turned on Buffy.  
  
"Yeah." I said, even though he was done with me.  
  
"You want your vampire back." He said.  
  
"Yeah." She said.  
  
He laughed.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Look what love's reduced you to."  
  
Buffy stiffened. My hands tightened into fists.  
  
"You were legendary dark warriors, and you let yourself be castrated. And you have the audacity to crawl in here and demand your lovers back?"  
  
"I'm still a warrior." I said.  
  
"Me too." Said Buffy.  
  
"You're a pathetic excuse for a demon." Said Lurky. "And you! The Slayer who runs from her fate."  
  
"Yeah? I'll show you pathetic. Give me your best shot." I said.  
  
"Bring it." Said Buffy, shortening my taunt.  
  
"You'd never endure the trials required to grant your request."  
  
"Do your worst. But when I win ... I want what I came here for." I said.  
  
"When I win." Said Buffy. "Because the last test is us. Each other. Only one wish, Lurky. Only one."  
  
I grinned. "Get that?" I asked him.  
  
"Prepare yourself." He said. I thought about it.  
  
"Prepared." I said. "You?"  
  
Buffy nodded. "I'm up."  
  
"You think so?"  
  
"Yeah. And, you know, given the lack of number two pencils, I guess we're not starting with the written." I said.  
  
A huge mass of muscles entered the wrong.  
  
"The first challenge." Grated the deep voice.  
  
"Piece of cake." I smirked. Buffy nodded.  
  
Muscles slapped his hands together, and they burst into flames.  
  
"Or not." Said Buffy.  
  
He charged, executing a lightning fast move that sent me tumbling. I rolled with it, but I went down hard. Buffy snapped a kick, but he hit her, putting her coat on fire. I roared, kicking off my duster and charging her, throwing it over her. Smothering the fire.  
  
I whirled, charging muscles. He didn't expect that, stumbling back, then punching at me. I grabbed his fist, punching him a few times.  
  
My hand was on fire.  
  
He punched me as I howled, throwing me to the ground. He moved to finish me, but Buffy was there, slamming into him, knocking him down. I groaned, getting back into the fight. Two on one, he was still giving as good as he got.  
  
Then he hit Buffy, sending her flying, then he hit me. I went down, and he went for Buffy. "Finish her." Said Lurky.  
  
"No taking sides!" I spat at him, charging. I jumped up on muscles' back, yanking his head hard to one side. His neck didn't break, so I went back the other way.  
  
He went down, hard.  
  
Buffy was breathing hard, clutching her ribs. "Oh, ow." She said.  
  
"We did it." I said, grinning.  
  
"Congratulations." Said Lurky. "You've passed step one."  
  
"Step one?" Said Buffy.  
  
Two demons with pointy ears charged us.  
  
"Step bloody two!" I screamed, punching one. Buffy turned, facing the other. The fight was one.  
  
This one was more vicious. These demons just kept coming, kept pressing. I was all out of energy, all out of fight. Beaten down.  
  
Beaten.  
  
"We're done." I gasped, pushing one away and leaping against Buffy.  
  
"Never!" She shot back, grabbing me around the neck in a lock. I tried to shake her off. The demons grabbed me from behind, tearing at my back.  
  
"We're out!" I growled. She was out. And I wasn't much better.  
  
"No!" She said, grabbing the back of my skull, forcing my head down against her shoulder.  
  
Right against her pulse.  
  
"Drink." She said, punching a demon.  
  
"You're crazy." I said, and bit her.  
  
I tried to make it gentle, but it wasn't. She screamed in pain, and the blood flowed into me.  
  
Slayer strength too.  
  
Slayer plus demon equals dumb demons.  
  
I pulled free after a second and turned on them with a renewed energy, the magical force burning in me, tripling my strength. I destroyed them, taking their heads in a minute. "What next?" I asked, mocking, moving back to Buffy, who was even weaker now.  
  
There was a skittering, and I saw bugs approaching. Buffy whimpered, and I realized the bugs would go down her mouth and nose. Kill her.  
  
I jumped on top of her, pressing her face against my chest in a crushing grip, wrapping my arms and legs around her, cutting off her air. She tried to throw me off, but then the bugs were on us, biting, stinging, cutting.  
  
I rolled, crushing them beneath us. There were more, swarming, killing. Her arms, free, slashed over my back, killing the ones there. I let out a roar, rolling harder.  
  
The Slayer strength was still with me.  
  
This test was not easy. It went on, and she was weakening. No air. I wasn't. The slayer strength in me carried me on.  
  
But it ended and we lay there, wrapped up in each other, tangled together, gasping for air. I rolled onto my back and Buffy crawled up, resting her head in the crook between my shoulder and chest.  
  
"No more." She whispered. "Oh, please, no more."  
  
"You have finished the trials." Said the demon.  
  
Buffy laughed. "Piece of cake." She mocked.  
  
"One wish." Reminded the demon.  
  
I stared down at the blond head curled in my shoulder. "Bloody hell." I moaned. 


	13. The victory

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. I'm not creative at all, my original entries on FictionPress not withstanding. Joss is the Creative One.  
  
Summary: Post Season-2 AU. Buffy and Spike team up to go fight a demon for a Big Wish-one Big Wish, two warriors. You do the math.  
  
She rolled off me, coming up to a crouch. I rose to my feet heavily, feeling the weight in my leaden legs. The green eyes stared down at us, enjoying itself.  
  
"All right." I said. "Let's do this."  
  
"No regrets?" She asked.  
  
"I'm a vampire, love. I don't do the whole regret thing." I replied, charging her.  
  
She responded by slamming into me, punching me hard and knocking me away. "Thanks for saving my life." She said.  
  
"You saved mine first." I pointed out. I could still feel the open wounds on my back stinging in the open air.  
  
I punched her in the face, knocking her down. "Thanks." I added.  
  
"You're welcome," she said, scissoring her legs and knocking me down. "Although giving you my blood seems a bit stupid now."  
  
"Hindsight and all that?" I said, landing hard on my back. I let out a growl.  
  
"Sorry." She said.  
  
"It's all right." I said, trying to get back to my fight. She kicked my in the ribs, and I felt them break. "Ow!" I said.  
  
She didn't say sorry this time, getting to her feet and charging. I responded with the best speed I could, jumping up at her and punching.  
  
Her face was hard now, and I realized I wasn't going to win. I'd put too much into beating the challenges. She had me.  
  
She blocked my punch, catching my arm under hers, and slammed a fist into my face. I reeled back and she pulled me closer, smashing my arm and breaking the bone. I yelled and she kicked my shin, and as I fell down, leg broken, she grunted, stepping back.  
  
"Ow!" I yelled. "Good one." I said admiringly, crawling backwards, away from her.  
  
She looked at me, troubled. "I can't do this." She said.  
  
"I would." I offered.  
  
"Would you, really?" She asked me. "You're cold." She accused.  
  
"I'm a vampire." I said. "An evil thing. A demon inhabiting a human's body."  
  
"No." She said. "Angel was better than that."  
  
"Angel was a freak!" I shot at her. "Just get it over with."  
  
She approached, kicking me in the face. My head snapped back and the room began spinning, and when it stopped she was propping me up against the wall and my legs were burning, so hot, so painful.  
  
"Just answer me one question, and be honest." She hissed. "You said you could change your own world. Would you do that, for me?"  
  
"Desperately self-conscious question." I muttered. "Maybe."  
  
"Maybe?" She asked. "You can't change your world, Spike. You think you can, but you don't have a choice."  
  
"Maybe I don't." I agreed. "I like this life well enough."  
  
She threw me to the ground, looking away. "You could change my world." She said quietly.  
  
"Oh, please!" I moaned.  
  
"Easily." She said. "But I can't change yours."  
  
I struggled to my knees. I wasn't ready to be on my feet just yet, and my arm was still broken.  
  
"No, you can't." I agreed. "I'm a vampire. I don't change, I'm eternal."  
  
"Eternally evil." She replied.  
  
"You can't change that." I said.  
  
"I could change your world." She said, suddenly, her eyes flashing. "I could change your world, Spike."  
  
I snorted. "Well, then, go ahead! Change my world!" I shouted the last three words, and she kicked me back to the ground, resting her foot on my chest. I stared up at her, into her eyes. She was so strong, but in that second she was so vulnerable.  
  
"Please." I added belatedly, softly, almost in a whisper.  
  
She walked away, towards Lurky, and I realized she was going to wish Angel back.  
  
It figured. Every time anything seemed to be going good in my life, Angelus stole it. Hobby of his, really.  
  
Then Lurky approached me. "Very well." He said. "You've passed the trials, and this one gift is yours. I return . . . your soul."  
  
And then his hand was on my chest, and my world dissolved.  
  
The End  
  
A/N: What?! Of course it's the end! That's the beauty of it-all the buildup, and his world changes. What? Sequel? Well, yes, I'd like to. It would be different, though. Third-person, mostly about Xander and Willow and Angel (and Faith) and the odd couple that comes back to Sunnydale. What do you think? 


End file.
